A Breakthrough in Social Scientific Research
Journal Entry:
Wed Nov 18, 2009, 6:22 PM
*dons lab coat* Ehm, Dr. Rose speaking, And this is my lecture, "Boys have cooties, yes they do."
You see, I decided to try and figure out why boys were so dumb, and so I went to a rich first-world country where there were many males. And I studied their social interactions, or in a few cases the lack thereof. After careful examination of all things boy, I have deduced that the Y chormosome carries a plague, typically known as the 'cootie', but scientifically known as "stupidicus maleus" by us professionals. this plauge, as it were, affects the senses in males and deludes the way they see the world. My findings have shown that it makes breasts either seem more prominent or smaller than they typically are, depending on the female in question.
Also, it makes males more sensitive to the female hormone known as "slut", which in turn makes them suffer from "helpless swine" disease. This plague also blocks out a very important gene known as "sensitivity", making males less capable of sensing inner values, morals, and beauty. sadly, it appears as though this plague actually works to attract the more shy, quiet girls with the hormone "heart", making these girls more suseptible to "heart break" "lonliness" and "low self-esteem" during the vital teen years.
Luckily, this plague generally seems to fade with age, and is typically gone by the time the male is out of college, if not sooner. Drinking, smoking, and unmarried sex all seem to strengthen this plague, so they are not advised for young adult males. As always, caution should be exercised by females with men who suffer, as it can cause a negative emotional state of well being in these beautiful, smart young women.
Before I get any flames, yes, I'm well aware that not all boys are as I've portrayed them, and not all girls are innocent and pure either. Please keep in mind that this was written as a joke to cheer up a friend!
- Mood:
Neutral - Listening to: We Heya Amla Eih (arabic)
- Reading: Macbeth
- Playing: KH 358/2 Days
- Eating: Cake
- Drinking: blood *shot*
--
"Fully self-diagnosed people are worthless parasites and keep the afflicted from getting help."
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" DR.RIKU IS OPEN FOR BUSINESS, GET ON THE COUCH AND TAKE OFF YOUR PAN-...TELL ME YOUR PROBLEMS." -Rue
--
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear in that we are powerful beyond measure. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?"
-Marianne Williamson
--
"Fully self-diagnosed people are worthless parasites and keep the afflicted from getting help."
-----
" DR.RIKU IS OPEN FOR BUSINESS, GET ON THE COUCH AND TAKE OFF YOUR PAN-...TELL ME YOUR PROBLEMS." -Rue
--
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear in that we are powerful beyond measure. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?"
-Marianne Williamson
--
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Everyone has a right to their opinion, but everyone has a responsibilty to have an educated opinion.
--
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear in that we are powerful beyond measure. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?"
-Marianne Williamson
Right After You Do This.
Just read the little stories and
Think of a wish as you scroll all
The way to the bottom. There is
A message there - then make your
Wish.
No attachment on this one.
!
Stories
I'm 13 years old, and I wished
That my dad would come home from
The army, because he'd been having
Problems with his heart and right
Leg It was 2:53 p .m.. When I made
My wish. At 3: 07 PM . (14 minutes
Later), the doorbell rang, and
There my Dad was, luggage and all!!
I'm Katie and I'm 20 and I've been
Having trouble in my job and on the
Verge of quitting. I made a simple
Wish that my boss would get a new
Job. That was at 1:35 and at 2:55
There was an announcement that he
Was promoted and was leaving for
Another city. Believe me...this
Really works!!!
My name is Ann and I am 45 years
Of age. I had always been single
And had been hoping to get into a
Nice, loving relationship for many
Years. While kind of daydreaming(and right after receiving this email)
I wished that a quality person would
Finally come into my life. That was at
9:10 AM on a Tuesday. At 9:55 AM
A FedEx delivery man came into my
Office.He was cute, polite and
Could not stop smiling at me. He
Started coming back almost everyday(even without packages) and asked me
Out a week later . We married 6
Months later and now have been
Happily married for 2 years.
What a great email it was!!
Just scroll down to the end, but
While you do, think of a wish.
Make your wish when you have completed
Scrolling. Whatever age you are, is the
Number of minutes it will take for your
Wish to come true. Ex.you are 25 years
Old, it will take 25 minutes for your wish
To come true).
However, if you don't send this to
People in 5 minutes, you will have bad
Luck for years!!
Go for it!!!
!
SCROLL DOWN!!!!
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STOP!!!
Congratulations!!! Your wish will
Now come true in your age minutes.
Now follow this carefully....it
Can be very rewarding!!!!
If you send this to 10 more
People, other than the 5 that you
Already have to send to, something
Major that you've been wanting
Will happen.
Message: This is scary!
The phone will ring right after
You do this!
--
"Fully self-diagnosed people are worthless parasites and keep the afflicted from getting help."
-----
" DR.RIKU IS OPEN FOR BUSINESS, GET ON THE COUCH AND TAKE OFF YOUR PAN-...TELL ME YOUR PROBLEMS." -Rue
Really now?
--
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear in that we are powerful beyond measure. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?"
-Marianne Williamson
--
"Fully self-diagnosed people are worthless parasites and keep the afflicted from getting help."
-----
" DR.RIKU IS OPEN FOR BUSINESS, GET ON THE COUCH AND TAKE OFF YOUR PAN-...TELL ME YOUR PROBLEMS." -Rue
--
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear in that we are powerful beyond measure. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?"
-Marianne Williamson
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